“Kevin, so good to see you!”
“Sarah, how long has it been?”
“Oh much too long,” Sarah and Kevin embraced, “come in, come in!”
He walked through the door and eyed the surroundings. “Wow Sarah, this place looks nice. How many hours a week do you put into this place?”
“Oh this?” she said, as if she had never been asked the question before. “I don’t know, maybe thirty hours? Not full time.”
“Well it looks great.” Kevin put his hands in his pockets. “How ‘bout a full tour?”
“I couldn’t, this place is a wreck! Just look at it.” She turned her back to him and lifted her phone up in front of his face. Wordlessly Kevin fell in line behind her and smiled. Sarah snapped a photo of them both, lips puckered out.
“You should see my house,” Kevin continued. “Ever since my RoboMaid went out of commission it’s kind of piled up.”
“How long ago was that?”
“Three maybe four hours before I showed up.”
“And they haven’t fixed it yet?” Sarah asked incredulously. “That is ridiculous.”
“I know, I called RoboTechSupport and after waiting forty seconds—“
“—way. So after being put on hold, I finally talked to a Robot – not an AutoBot – and they said they’d have someone out by the time my RoboCook made dinner. If they’re not there at… well whenever my RoboCook usually makes me dinner I’m going to have to call the RoboCops.”
“And no one wants that.” She reasoned. “Oh what the heck, sure I’ll give you a tour.”
The two of them walked into the kitchen, freshly cut onions, cilantro and other spices filled the air. The stove was steaming with a broth in the pot. A loud tatatatatatat, like the sound of a machine gun, came from the cutting board.
“Not too small RoboCook, I like my carrots large and crunchy.”
The robot turned at the waist 180 degrees to meet her eyes, “Of course Ms. Parker.” Its metallic hand slid across the cutting board and pushed the pile of carrots into the garbage can. It grabbed another pile of carrots and started over.
“Did you see in the RoboNews that one of the RoboCops stabbed some guy with a dataspike?” Sarah asked. “Right in the kidney. Apparently the guy was trying to walk into the kitchen of a diner and start cooking. He was yammering on about some restaurant he had, and how he knew what he was doing, blah blah blah.” Sara sighed and shrugged her shoulders. “He lived, but he’ll spend the rest of his days in Relaxation Treatment no doubt. The guy went wack.”
“Back in the kitchen? Like to work?”
“Jesus, what a loony. He should have been seeing a RoboPsychologist.”
“Apparently he was. He was an old timer, from before Perfect Unemployment.”
“Couldn’t live with in the future, I guess. People like him are keeping humanity down.”
“Right? Better to keep him out of the gene pool I suppose – here’s the bathroom.” She gestured with the sway of her arm. “I painted this whole area red last week.”
“This week it’s green.”
“Yeah I wanted to keep with the Christmas theme this year. Alternating colors every few weeks keeps me in the Christmas spirit I wish – ” She held up her camera again, finding both their faces in the view finder. They both smiled and posed for the camera. She snapped the picture, and uploaded it online. “—there were more colors, but my RoboShopper insists there are only forty-five to choose from.”
“I know, I even spoke to their RoboManager to complain. I’m hoping they’ll get more colors next week. Come on, my room is next.”
They left the bathroom and briefly walked through the hallway, moving around another Robot scrubbing the floorboards.
“RoboMaid, don’t forget to clip my toenails today.”
“Of course, Ms. Parker.”
“And here it is!” she said with a smile, her arms open as if to embrace her room like an old friend. “What do you think?”
“Wow! It’s wonderful in here!” his eyes wide with wonder, a grin from ear to ear. “I love what you’ve done with the pictures.”
“Well, thank you!” Her hands planted themselves on her waist. “A selfie for every hour of the day. The digital displays update with every picture I take.” She pointed to the southern wall, “that one is my top 100 friends online and their selfies. It’s a shrine to humanity, really.”
“Deep. That two week art degree you got is really showing.”
“Thank you. It was a hard couple weeks but totally worth it. You should think about doing the same, you know? There’s a conflict management associates degree that only takes a few days.”
“Meh, I don’t have that kind of time.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets. “This is your bed here?”
She looked at him slyly. “Why yes, yes it is.”
“Your RoboMaid set it beautifully.”
Sarah crossed her arms and tilted her head. A guilty smile crept up the right side of her face, “that was actually me.”
He shot a look at her, “really?”
“Yeah…” she shrugged again, “I just have a hard time dropping—“ her hand shot up the with camera, Kevin came in close behind her to fit his face in the picture. They both smiled as she snapped the photo. “—old habits I guess.”
“Who doesn’t? It looks comfortable.”
“Why don’t we see?” She grabbed him by the hand and walked him to the bed. She turned to his face and he kissed her on the lips. The of them pulled away slowly, and met each other’s eyes again.
“It has been much too long,” Sarah whispered.
They eased themselves on the bed and resumed. Kevin wrapped his arms around her, their eyes locked together and again he went in for another kiss.
“Wait,” Sarah whispered, placing her hand on his chest.
“Is something wrong?”
“No, no,” she rolled over and depressed a button on the side of her bed. A loud beep emitted from the ceiling. “RoboMatchMaker; pleasure.” She turned back to Kevin and pressed her lips lightly on the side of the mouth. A devilish grin spread across his face. “Now sit back relax.”